i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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