STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
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