I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
I love how my cats smell like pot.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
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