HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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