Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
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