I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
