Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
So apparently I’m into choking now
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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