just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Pooping to opera.
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