I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Randomize
