next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
