Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
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