My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize