id be glad to
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Randomize