he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Randomize
