He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
