don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
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