I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
