Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Randomize
