Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Randomize
