..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
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