Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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