Define "chronic" masturbator.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Randomize
