You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Randomize
