lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
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