I love black thongs
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Randomize
