1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
not ubering you a puppy
ok first of all what the fuck
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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