PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
