i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
