Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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