I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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