You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize