Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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