How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
