do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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