sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
