im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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