Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
