I have demons in me.
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
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