Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
Randomize
