I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
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