Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
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