I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
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