dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Randomize
