I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
is it fun? or sober?
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize