My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
