I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize