Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Randomize