I accidentally had phone sex last night
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
