Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
