i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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