didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize
