Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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